Too long between postings

The words of this hymn are flowing through my mind tonight, as I think over the events of the day. I had a routine appointment today with Dr. Holmes. This appointment capped off a week of medical appointments: a blood draw last week, a mammogram yesterday, and Dr. Holmes office today. All routine events, but still "must-dos." "Must-dos" in order to find out what is happening deep inside of me. My neighbor and I discussed this very thing on Monday while we chatted at the mail box. He has been undergoing treatment for colon cancer, and he was relaying the good news of his latest GOOD report from his doctor. We discussed how, even though we feel perfectly well, we still don't know for sure if there is any unseen activity. It's a rather creepy feeling, to tell the truth. It's a true test of one's faith. And, as hard as we all try, some times those tests are harder than others. Today was one of those days.

I spent the day trying to stay relaxed. After all, I had been through this sort of thing many times before. But, today, I was having a harder time. I was very distracted and found it hard to focus all day long. I arrived at the appointment a bit early and stayed in the car, reading for a bit. I was taken into the exam room fairly quickly, after barely making it through half a magazine. I was expecting to see Nurse Janice for this appointment, but I heard Dr. Holmes familiar knock on the door. She bounded into the room with a set of red, felt Valentine hearts on her head, attached by a red headband! That's why I love this doctor; she knows exactly what the patient needs when in her office..........laughter!
Anyway, once I stopped laughing, Dr. Holmes asked me the usual questions about how I was doing. Then she gave me all of my paperwork and lab results - all of which she pronounced "100% perfect!" Whew. I could almost feel my pulse drop. I wanted to hug her but thought that might be a bit much, so we chatted through the rest of the appointment. And then, I was done. As quickly as I got in, I was finished. I think it was the quickest appointment ever. There was nothing else to do. So, I sent the news via text message to Michael, who is traveling, and headed home. Yes......often my frame is feeble. I am grateful for the loving hand of my Father who gently bears me when I need it.

I realized as I began my post here, tonight, that I haven't posted since Colleen passed away. In fact, she commented on my last post. Oh, how I miss her. I miss being able to share these good reports with her, for she always knew exactly what I was feeling and always knew exactly what words to say. Her e-mails and cards are quite precious to me now. How her family must miss her, too. I think of them often and continue to pray for their comfort in their sadness. And I am sure that they rejoice with me in knowing she is no longer sick or in pain but instead sits in the presence of her beloved Savior!


I have 3 months until my next appointment with the radiation oncologist (6 mo. rotation) and 6 months until I meet with Dr. Holmes again. I will try to remember to check in again in May. I suppose that needing to remember to check in is a good thing, right?

posted by Kim @ 1:11 AM 1 comments

Update

I had a follow up check up with Dr. Fan today. He is the radiation oncologist who replaced Dr. Reddy last year. I think I was in and out of the office building within 30 minutes. In fact, when I commented on the speed with which I was getting attention, the nurse offered to let me sit in the waiting room for an hour, "to get the full doctor experience!" I declined her kind offer.

There is really nothing new to report. This is truly a case of "no news is GOOD news!" Dr. Fan asked me the usual questions, to which I relplied "No" to all of them. He examined my incision area and said everything looked good. I will return in 6 months to see him unless I have a reason to come in earlier.

God is good. Ryan is getting married this Saturday. God, in His timing and grace, has allowed me to be able to live these past 2 years and watch Ryan's relationship with Noelle blossom. For that, I am grateful. It is humbling to know that life is so fragile, and yet our Creator loves each of us and grants us the desires of our hearts. So, I am privileged to join another club this weekend - that of "mother-in-law." It will be an honor.

posted by Kim @ 4:36 PM 3 comments

Great is His faithfulness

I had my 3 month check up with Dr. Holmes today. Actually, I saw NP Janice and could hear Dr. Holmes bustling about between exam rooms. The wait time today was longer than the exam time. NP Janice came in to see me, and after commenting (as she always does) about how thick my hair grew back in, she told me that all of my labs came back GREAT! All the levels were good, especially that 'ol tumor marker number. Praise the Lord!

posted by Kim @ 7:43 PM 2 comments

730 days later........

January 18, 2006 was spent sitting in a doctor's office hearing news that would change my life forever. "You have breast cancer." Welcome to the club.

Fast forward 730 days to January 18, 2008:

So far today, I have:

• awakened next to my husband, to the sound of rain on the roof
• seen Justin off to work
• taken the girls to piano lessons, getting to drive for the first time on the new bypass!
• returned a dress to Macy's
• stopped at McD's for coffee to ward off the chills of a damp and drizzly January morning
• stopped at the grocery store to purchase chicken for dinner
• made deposits at the credit union
• picked the girls up from piano lessons
• driven home
• chatted with the neighbor to schedule Kathryn to babysit
• invited a friend and her husband to use extra opera tickets we have for this evening
• read countless e-mails, blog posts and news update

And.......it's only 1 P.M.!

There are still countless things to do today and more on the docket for tomorrow and the days and weeks to come. There trips being planned. There is a wedding being planned! There is LIFE to live!!!

I humbly give thanks to God for giving me these past 730 days. Who knows what tomorrow may bring; there are no guarantees. While so much that goes on each day might seem mundane, and at times even frustrating, I constantly purpose to appreciate each and every one of those days He gives me as a precious gift. I don't ever want to take them for granted.

"So teach us to number our days, that we may apply our hearts unto wisdom." ~ Psalm 90:12

"Because thy lovingkindness is better than life, my lips shall praise thee." ~ Psalm 63:3

posted by Kim @ 12:58 PM 3 comments

Pondering.....

posted by Kim @ 2:42 PM 0 comments

3 month check up....

This past Thursday was my three month check up at Dr. Holmes' office. After all of the hubbub of August's visit, I decided to downplay this one as much as possible. Getting blood drawn wasn't going to be a big deal. Just go to the doctor. Just DO it!

Try as I might, it's still hard not to think too much when those appointments come around. But, I still tried to keep cool about it when Thursday came. Having an afternoon appointment didn't make the wait any easier, either.

I saw NP Janice this time as Dr. Holmes was at an all day breast cancer clinic. The office was really busy; my 2PM appointment time turned into a 3:15 time. Appointments are so much shorter these days, though, when there are no real "issues" to discuss. The bottom line for Thursday's appointment is that my blood work is still good, and there are NO signs of recurrence! Praise the Lord!

My next appointment with Dr. Holmes is set for February, 2008. That month, I also will see the radiation oncologist. In the mean time, there are birthdays, Thanksgiving, Christmas, wedding plans, and a lot of LIFE to live!!!

posted by Kim @ 6:26 PM 3 comments

A year ago today........

A year ago today I had my breast cancer surgery. I remember thinking that August 18th was the anniversary of the day my mom died, in 1984, and I wasn't particularly thrilled about having that be my surgery day. But, I since I had no choice in the matter, the surgery went on. So, here it is......August 18th again, a year later. What a year it has been! God has been so gracious to me; it amazes me, even now, to think about it.

The first 2 weeks of the month have been filled with trips to various doctors and for various tests. Here is a rundown for you:

Wednesday, August 1 - went for labwork and a chest x-ray in preparation for my appointment with Dr. Holmes

Thursday, August 9 - appointment at Dr. Holmes' office; met with NP Janice who told me that the chest x-ray and labwork looked GREAT! The tumor markers were also GREAT! My blood pressure was rather high, so she told me to call my primary care dr. to see what he wants to do about it. Guess I have to....it's been something they've talked about for a while now. I also filled Janice in about the few bouts of dizziness I had been experiencing since my last appt. in May (does anyone else ever get dizzy just when lying down on one's left side?), in addition to the headaches I had while in Denver (altitude?) and as much as I didn't want to hear it, she ordered a brain MRI (and come back in 3 months). Ugh. I was honestly thinking and hopping that it was sinus related or something. She explained that my type of breast cancer (her2+) most often metastizes to the soft tissue in the brain. Double ugh. While she said I "looked stable," she wanted to cover all the bases. That's a good thing, right? What a double-edged sword.....wanting to know what's up but dreading the answer..... So, I came home and immediately made an appointment for the MRI (made for Monday, 8/13), as well as the MUGA (heart) scan that was also ordered (the last of the series, I am told).

Saturday, Tomball Hospital calls to tell me that they have to rescedule the MRI as the system is down and won't be repaired until Monday, then tested on Tuesday and Wednesday was already filled (so much for the word URGENT on my order). We reschedule the MRI for Thursday, 8/16, and I again ask God to give me the grace to be patient.

Monday, August 13 - Since I am not having an MRI, I get to take Meaghan bowling with a group of young people from our church. It was her first time bowling, and she had a fun time, in spite of taking one hard fall at the beginning of the session. The soreness hit her about noon on Tuesday, but she still said it was fun!

Wednesday, August 15 - Dropped Kathryn off at the library for her last volunteer session for the summer, then Meaghan and I headed over to the Cancer Center for my appointment with the radiation oncologist. While Meaghan worked on a puzzle in the waiting room, I met one of the new doctors, Dr. T. Phan (I am told his brother also sees patients there - he goes by another initial, I guess!). This doctor is even younger than the last one, if I were one to bet. Whatever his age, he was very attentive and encouraging about the upcoming MRI. He even did a short neurological exam and told me that I looked "sound." So, after being told they would follow up on getting the results of the MRI, I made my next appointment.....for next February (6 months)! It is hard to even think that far ahead, but I enjoy filling up those calendar pages with things "to do" far off in the future.

After the doctor, we headed back to pick Kathryn up from the library where she had been hob-nobbing with our US Representative, Michael McCaul. He was there reading to the pre-schoolers.........want to guess how many of the little tykes even knew where Washington, D.C. was, let alone who he was? Kathryn said that one little girl did know who the President was ("Bush!"), but that was pretty much it for the civics class at the library. So, I dropped the girls off at home and headed back to the hospital's Heart Center for my afternoon MUGA test It was uneventful, other than the one lady who drew my blood and made such a big mess you would have thought I was bleeding to death - there were bloody gauze pads everywhere! But the lady who administered the test was the same one who has done all of them since I had my first one in May of last year. I always appreciate continuity when it comes to a health care team; it's nice to know that they "know" you.

Thursday, August 16, 7:35 AM - Michael and I drive to the hospital to check in for the MRI. Since it was my very first MRI, I opted to take a "happy" pill before I went; Michael was my designated driver. Other than the fact that the buildings were freezing that early in the morning, things went quickly and smothly. Whoever said they could sleep through that test can probably sleep through an earthquake! It was the noisiest test I have ever taken, and I surprised by movements of the machine. But, I realized that I probably didn't need the "happy" pill; I don't think that I am claustrophobic enough. Closing my eyes always seems to take care of any issues for me. We were back in the car by 8:45 and home by 9. I was in bed by 9:30, to sleep off my drugs. Good thing I did, as I didn't wake up until 1:15!!!

The doctor's office had told me that the results would take about 3 days, but when I left the MRI building, the lady there said the doctor would have the results by the afternoon. I was sure that meant that they had seen something bad during the test and needed to rush the results (oh ye of little faith crops up again). So, I prayed some Psalms as I drifted off to sleep, to take my mind off of the "what-ifs." At about 3:00, the phone rang, and my heart sank as I saw the doctor's office's number on Caller ID. You see, NP Janice had said that we should call in about 3 days, but they would call me if there was a problem. Ugh. So, I took a deep breath, said hello, and nearly burst into tears when Robin, the lady on the other end of the phone, told me that the test results were back and that everything was


So, I don't have an answer yet as to why I have had those few dizzy episodes and headaches. I'll follow up with my primary care doctor since I have to see him anyway. But, for now my brain is cancer-free, and for that, I am eternally grateful to my Father in heaven. He continues to extend His tender mercies to me time and time again.

posted by Kim @ 6:03 PM 2 comments