Testing means waiting....and waiting....and waiting....
Today I had my bone scan at the hospital. This is done to see if the cancer cells have spread to your bones. The process involves injecting radioactive "stuff" into one's vein, letting it course through the bloodstream and then taking "pictures." So, I headed for the hospital a bit before 9 this morning to get my injection at 9. I was out by 9:12....it was wonderfully quick. I ran some local errands, went home to check on schoolwork and get lunch, and headed back to the hospital at noon for the whole body scan.
When I arrived, I was told I would need to wait about 15 minutes as they were finishing up another test. At about 12:20, I was called in and positioned on another long "slab" built not only to scan bodies but to also test people's ability to not panic if they don't like enclosed places. I kid you not - that bone scan thingy was no more than 3 inches from my nose! It was a relatively easy test, if you don't mind lying still for long periods of time. I wish they played some music during the test, though. It would help pass the time, I think. Plus, it would help drown out the voices of the techs who are discussing your case within earshot. Somehow that unnerved me, and when the test was completed, all I wanted to do was rush home where I knew it was safe. They tell me the results will be back either late tomorrow or Thursday. God is sovereign over this, too, so I will keep reminding myself of that and try to sleep well tonight.
I also remembered that I had not scheduled a follow up appointment with the surgeon after last week's biopsy, in spite of the reminder on the post-op orders sitting on my desk. I called the doctor's office in the late morning and had an appointment for 3:15 today. I still am amazed at how pleasant their staff is to work with; they are
so helpful. Michael went with me, armed with a list of questions for the doctor. After I had my one lone stitch removed, the doctor sat with us and answered as many questions as we threw at him. We found out the following things:
- The pathology on the skin biopsy came back negative, indicating that the cancer did not involve the skin. However, the oncologist still says (and told the surgeon) that the skin still looks like a classic case of inflammatory breast cancer (meaning it does involve the skin) and she is proceeding with that understanding. The way the surgeon explains it is that it is possible to get a false negative if the area of skin he biopsied is clear but a surrounding area is not. It makes sense to us, plus the treatment course would be exactly the same right now anyway.
- The results from the receptor test also came back, showing that hormones are not triggering this cancer. Instead, I am Her2/neu positive.....in layman terms, that means that mine is the more aggressive type of cancer and will be treated with a once a week routine, instead of a once every 21 days routine. While that doesn't thrill me, it doesn't really surprise me. I told Michael that I fully expect God to send "big" trials our way. I figure that way, He'll get all that much more glory at the end!
- I will have another out-patient surgery next Monday morning, in order to have the port put in for the chemo injections. The surgeon was really waiting to see what we decided about MD Anderson (they don't want ports). Since we decided against MD Anderson, we are go for the port. That is the last thing on the "to do" list, after the heart scan on Friday. Since my brother and sister-in-law will be in town this weekend through Tuesday, I asked the surgeon to schedule it as early as possible on Monday; he says I can go first. Told you they were accommodating!
So the rest of the week will be filled with "life" as we celebrate Meaghan's birthday tomorrow, jury duty on Thursday, a heart scan on Friday and getting ready for company this weekend. And oh yes, the Super Bowl is Sunday! I am looking forward to next week as it means the end of waiting to start treatment. Waiting gets old very quickly. As much as I don't look forward to chemo treatments and the accompanying disruptions in life, I would much rather do something than just wait.
Teaching time
Yesterday, while going through a mail order clothing catalog, Kathryn came across underclothing and prosthetics for those who have undergone mastectomies. Since she was curious about the subject, I took that as a prompting that this would be a good time to explain another aspect of this cancer road about which the girls had not yet heard. Surprisingly, they were not phased in the least, although Meaghan did screw up her nose once or twice during the conversation. Kathryn, always the more serious one of the two, questioned me about whether or not my mother (her grandma) had had a mastectomy during her bout with cancer 30 years ago. The answer was yes.
Never being one to relinquish teaching time, I then decided to broach another topic with the girls. While we had discussed with them that my treatment would be difficult and not without adjustments, we hadn't yet spoken about specifics. I decided it was time to talk about hair loss. Neither of them realized that I will most likely lose my hair during the chemo treatments. Meaghan promised me she would buy me a wig for my upcoming birthday in March and asked what color I would like. We then laughed over different color options and styles. However, the biggest laughs came when Kathryn (our ever serious one?) informed me that "cheap wigs" could be found in the Disney catalog, and I could have my choice of Snow White, Ariel, Cinderella and more!
I am so thankful for the ability to laugh with my girls; it does my heart good to see that they aren't afraid to keep the lines of communication open. I know that this trial won't be easy for them, and I would do anything to spare them the growing pains they are about to endure. But God has a bigger and better plan for them than I can ever imagine. I need to rest in the knowledge that He is sovereign over their lives, just as He is over mine. So, I will continue to look for teaching time, to do what I can to make this easier for them. And....since I am learning each step of the way, too....it should make for interesting lessons!
"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." Jeremiah 29:11
Where to start?
I decided that creating this blog, apart from our family's blog, would enable friends and family to get updates on my health issues, as well as to leave comments (if so desired). Now that Ryan so willingly set it up for me, I am supposed to begin posting. But...as the title states........where do I start?
It hasn't even been 3 weeks since I first had an inkling of what was going on, yet it seems as though I have had this breast cancer diagnosis for a l-o-n-g time. Since January 5, when they did my first "routine" mammogram, I have had an ultrasound, chest x-ray, PET scan, CT scan, 2 biopsies, 1 pre-op appointment and 6 doctors' appointments. I am so very grateful that most of these were scheduled for me; Jennifer at Dr. Harkins' office has been absolutely wonderful. I have 2 more tests scheduled for this coming week - a bone scan on Tuesday and a heart scan on Friday. The bone scan will tell us whether or not the cancer has spread to the bones; the heart scan will tell us if my heart can withstand the chemo treatments. Meaghan asked last night, "And what if it can't?" Hmmmmm....good question.........
We picked my oncologist this week. Her name is
Dr. Frankie Holmes; she was on staff at MD Anderson for many years but is now in private practice. Her specialty is breast cancer, and she has come highly recommended by both my gynecologist and a friend from church who saw her during
her bout with breast cancer 10 years ago. Even though her office is a 40 minute drive from here, versus 5 minutes to Tomball Hospital, Michael and I both feel extremely at ease with her manner and (most importantly!) her expertise. I will still continue to see my local surgeon and will be able to do the radiation portion of my treatment right here in Tomball at the new
Cancer Center.
So, we still have a little bit more time to wait. We are still waiting on the results from Tuesday biopsy which will give us the receptor status that we need so the doctors can accurately choose the correct chemo drugs. I am hoping those results will be in by mid-week, but since there is only one lab (in California) which does the work, we are on their time schedule. Once those results are in, along with the results from the bone and heart scans, the doctor wants to start treatment....maybe as early as the week of February 6. Oh yes, and before they can start, I need to have a "port" put in the right side of my chest so they can have a place to inject the drugs. I feel another call to Jennifer coming on!
I have been flooded with e-mails, calls, visits, cards and meals already; it is all quite overwhelming. Everyone has been so very kind and caring. This is all so new to us yet, but the support we have had from friends and family has helped so much. We brought 2 meals home from church just this afternoon; they knew it would be a busy week ahead and wanted to help. God has been holding our hands step by step through these past few weeks; please know that your prayers are appreciated more than mere words can express.
As we hear more during the week, I will try to post updates. Until then, I will leave you with the passage of Scripture that I have been clinging to lately:
"It is of the Lord’s mercies that we are not consumed, because his compassions fail not. They are new every morning: great is thy faithfulness. The Lord is my portion, saith my soul; therefore will I hope in him. The Lord is good unto them that wait for him, to the soul that seeketh him." Lamentations 3:22-25
