Thank you for your prayers.....
I passed yesterday's labwork test! Yay! I was able to receive my fourth round of chemo without a hitch. My doctor's appointment was encouraging as well, as the doctor noted that she couldn't even feel the lymph node to measure it. She sent me away with an order for another PET scan as well as a heart scan. The PET scan will help her to see what is actually going on with the tumors, as right now, as she describes it, "We are working in the dark." Since she can't
feel anything right now, she can't know for sure what is actually still there. The heart scan is to help determine how my heart muscle has responded to the 10 weeks of Herceptin. So, by my next office visit (3 weeks) we should have more clinical evidence of what my status is.
I came home yesterday feeling exhausted. More tired than I have in a long time. Thank the Lord for cheap pizza night at Papa John's! Everyone was happy, and I didn't have to cook. I laid down for a
rest after dinner and ended up sleeping for 1.5 hours. I was afraid that the nap would interfere with my regular sleep, but thankfully I had no problem sleeping until 6 this morning.
I thank you again for your prayers and notes of encouragement that have come over the past few weeks. It is very special to have so many people conveying their love and well wishes.
"The effectual fervent prayer of a righteous man availeth much." ~James 5:16
God is in control......always and forever
This Monday was the first day I've been concerned about my labwork results. I remembered to ask for a copy right before I left the doctor's office, but I didn't look at the numbers until I got home. What I saw was a LOT of line items reading "L" and "LL", denoting that these levels were either low or very low. I am by no means an expert at reading lab results, but I do know that if certain levels get too low, I won't be able to receive my chemo treatment next Monday.
Next Monday, I am scheduled to receive my 4th chemo cycle, placing me halfway through the "plan." I know I will then be due for another heart scan (MUGA) and who knows what else as they test to see what toll the first couple of months have taken on the rest of my body. This is a treatment I r-e-a-l-l-y don't want to miss. So, faced with these low numbers, I found myself thinking what
I could do to get those numbers up. I looked on the Internet; I asked friends. I was going out of town, until Friday, so there was really nothing I could do with the doctors, as I would be out of the area. I found myself getting frustrated and shaken, realizing that there was virtually nothing I could do. I would just have to see what happened on Monday, with the next blood draw.
Last night, as I was lying awake (although trying to fall asleep!), I realized that I had taken my eyes off of the One who could change the numbers. Why should bloodwork be exempt from God's control? More importantly, why didn't I think of that first before wasting all my time worrying about what I could do to fix things? Don't get me wrong - I know that there are ways to boost the immune system and build a healthier body. But those things are long term processes, not something that can be achieved in less than a week. Coupled with my out of town trip, quick fixes aren't available right now. But.....prayer is. And petitioning the Lord for good numbers on Monday is a good way to focus my attention on His works rather than mine.
So, I would ask for your prayers this week, that God would work in my body to rebuild my blood to the point that the numbers would be favorable for me to receive the chemo treatment on Monday. He is Jehovah Rophi....the Lord who heals.
"And said, If thou wilt diligently hearken to the voice of the LORD thy God, and wilt do that which is right in his sight, and wilt give ear to his commandments, and keep all his statutes, I will put none of these diseases upon thee, which I have brought upon the Egyptians: for I am the LORD that healeth thee." ~Exodus 15:26
Attitude is everything
I received this in an e-mail from a friend and thought I would share it. I definitely can identify with this story!
Subject: Attitude is Everything!
There once was a woman who woke up one morning, looked in the mirror, and noticed she had only three hairs on her head. "Well," she said, "I think I'll braid my hair today." So she did and she had a wonderful day.
The next day she woke up, looked in the mirror and saw that she hadonly two hairs on her head. "H-M-M, " she said, "I think I'll part my hair down the middle today." So she did and she had a grand day.
The next day she woke up, looked in the mirror and noticed that she had only one hair on her head. "Well," she said, "Today I 'm going to wear my hair in a pony tail." So she did and she had a fun, fun day.
The next day she woke up, looked in the mirror and noticed that there wasn't a single hair on her head. "YEAH!" she exclaimed, "I don't have to fix my hair today!"
Attitude is everything.
Monday's trip........
This Monday's Herceptin treatment came and went without much fanfare. I drove myself as Michael had to be downtown for jury duty (he got picked, by the way!). Driving myself threw off my "routine" a bit. Not a
lot, mind you, but things just felt out of sync. For instance, I forgot to apply the lidocaine cream to my port area (I usually do this while
riding in the car, about 30 minutes before arriving at the doctor's office). I had been sitting in the waiting room a good 15 minutes before I remembered. I applied it anyway, but it didn't have a chance to numb the port area. Oh well. So, I just "bit the bullet" when the nurse stuck me. It just hurt a little......really.
My scalp had been really tender over the weekend, so I decided to forgo wearing "my hair" and just cover my head with a scarf. Meaghan told me that with my hoop earrings, I looked like a gypsy. We discovered that depending on how the knot is placed, I can go from gypsy to pirate to Aunt Jemima in a matter of seconds! But it was
much more comfortable wearing the scarf than wearing the wig.
Another of the more minor side effects of the chemo drugs has hit me. For the past week, I have had this really weird taste in my mouth. I noticed it right after the last chemo cycle, a week ago Monday. I thought that it might go away by the end of the week. But, here we are at Wednesday of the next week, and it's still here. It isn't anything really bad....certainly nothing to complain or make a fuss over. Everything just tastes weird; I can't describe it any other way. Funny thing is that it hasn't really affected my appetite too much. I still get hungry; things just don't taste right when I eat.
I got a card in the mail yesterday from a family I don't even know. They are friends of Michael's brother and sister-in-law. This was the second time they wrote to offer prayer and encouragement. It continues to amaze me how God has put people all across the country and around the world who are praying for me. It once again reminded upon me the importance of doing things like this for others. That card was a very bright spot at the end of a tiring day.
Today's "to do" list is a mile long with mundane things like laundry and meal planning to more pressing things like finishing up the income taxes. As I think about all there is to do and gear up to tackle the list, I am purposing to be thankful for the abilities to still get these things done. God continues to be gracious and has kept me strong through this first 8 weeks of treatments. I may not always have the energy levels as before, but He is keeping me
able to do all He asks of me. What more can I ask for?
"I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me."~Philippians 4:13
3rd treatment finished.....
Monday was chemo day. Chemo day means my time spent at the doctor's office is much longer than my shorter, Herceptin only, days. First, they draw blood. Actually, first they take my co-pay, and
then they draw blood. Then, I wait to be called back to the exam room. Once in the exam room, the nurse registers my weight (oh boy!), takes my blood pressure and temperature. Then I get to dress in a paper vest and wait patiently for the doctor to appear. Why is it that paper makes one sweat much more than fabric does?
Monday, I met the new nurse practitioner. She is so new, she isn't even listed on their website yet. But, she was very nice and gentle and thorough. The doctor did seem pleased with the shrinkage she noted in the lymph node under my arm. It has actually decreased in size by about two-thirds since I began treatment. They were making such a fuss over this, I neglected entirely to ask about the original tumor. Must have been the fact that by this time, there were 4 people, plus myself in this very tiny exam room. I was beginning to feel claustrophobic by the time the whole thing was over.
The next step is to wait in the "chemo" waiting area, a sort of holding tank for those who are waiting on bloodwork or to be called for their time in the chair. Mondays are usually busy times there, and this Monday was no different. When I was called in to sit down to get my drugs, all of the chairs were filled up! It's about a 2 1/2 hour session, from start to finish on these days. Pre-meds come first; those are anti-nausea drugs to help work with other anti-nausea drugs to prevent....you guessed it.....NAUSEA! So far, I must admit, they have worked wonderfully, and I haven't experienced any of the nasty stuff. Then I get 2 Tylenol and a shot of Benedryl to help counteract the potential flu-like side effects of the Herceptin. Other than the Benedryl making me feel "fuzzy" and sleepy, I haven't had any reactions to the Herceptin. After all of those things are out of the way, one of the very nice nurses begins to give me the rest of the daily menu. It is up to me whether I choose to make small talk with the nurses and other patients around me, or drift off for a Benedryl induced cat nap. I admit to succumbing now and again, although I do also try to make conversation with anyone else who is awake.
Then, all of a sudden...well, 2 1/2 hours later.....it is over. I am unhooked from the IVs, I get a nice bandaid over the spot where they stuck my port, and I am free to leave. This Monday, I was chauffeured home by a special lady from our church. She lives not too far from the doctor's office and offered to transport me if the need arose. I was happy to get a chance to ride home with her and share a time of reflection. You see, her family lost their youngest son to cancer last fall. I so enjoy hearing her stories of Cameron and what a trooper he was during his treatments. While their story is a sad one indeed, Cameron was such a model patient. Thank you for sharing your heart with me, Suzie.
This week has progessed a lot like the last cycle did. I had a good amount of energy yesterday and a bit less today. If this time continues like the last, my energy will dip more towards the weekend. However, there is a bridal shower this weekend at church, so I need to rest up
before then. I continue to rejoice that the Lord has spared me from the nasty side effects so many people experience. I also know that if my time comes to go through a harder chemo cycle, God will give me the grace to get through it. What a blessing to have that reassurance.
So, that's where I stand now. In three weeks, I will be finished with my first half of chemo treatments. I know I will have a another heart scan then, so they can make sure things are still ok there. There will then be only 4 more chemo cycles to go! It really doesn't seem so far away when looked at like this. Time always seems to fly by so quickly anyway. We will be far into the heat of Houston's summer by then....the land of never-ending air conditioning, which is another thing for which we thank God!
"Sing, O heavens; and be joyful, O earth; and break forth into singing, O mountains: for the LORD hath comforted his people, and will have mercy upon his afflicted." ~Isaiah 49:13
